If this is the only blog of mine you’re following, you’re following the wrong blog.

You’ll never find me mwahahaha

friendlyangryfeminist:

It’s hard not to be a bit, well, angry towards allies in any movement.

The fact is that I see male feminists get accolade and excused for abusive behavior because we ‘need male feminists’, I see straight people saying really vile homophobic things or thinking they can reclaim our slurs and then get forgiven because we ‘need straight allies’.

Not all allies are like that, but there are some people who have never seen allies be anything but abusive.

(Source: fauxcyborg)

A Letter to Daniel Tosh

projectunbreakable:

(In case you missed it: comedian Daniel Tosh came under fire this week for making public rape jokes.)

I don’t know you. You don’t know me. We will probably never meet.

Let’s pretend my name is not attached to the work I do. Not because I am ashamed, because you can easily find out the photographer behind these photos, but because this letter isn’t about me. It’s not for personal benefit or gain by getting you to look at my photographs. I simply felt compelled to reach out to you.

I think you should take a few minutes to reflect on what you said to that woman last week by looking at my work called Project Unbreakable. I photograph survivors of sexual assault. The survivors hold posters with quotes from the attackers in the photos. I didn’t do it to create a movement, I didn’t do it to change the world, I didn’t do it for fame or money or headlines. I did it to provide awareness. For people like you, who are likely good people who have made mistakes. We all make mistakes. But it’s important to not forget the severity rape has on women, men, and our culture in general. By joking about it, you are lessening the severity. You are telling survivors that they are less than. Worse, the only attention you are giving them is at their expense.

I know you have already apologized via Twitter. I know you’re probably sick of people berating you for your mistake. So what can you do now?

You can apologize to the women in your life. Statistics state that 1 in 4 women are assaulted in their lifetime, but my work has shown me the statistics are more along the lines of 1 in 2. I know 28 women in my direct, personal life who are affected by this. I would imagine the number is the same for you.

If you’re feeling brave enough, you can become an advocate. You don’t have to put hours of your time in, but you can support survivors in other ways: use your popular social media sites to share both stories of unfair justice and of hope, donate to RAINN or another organization, or maybe even create your own.

Rape and sexual assault affect all of us, whether you know it or not. It’s easy to turn away from the topic. It’s easy to make jokes. It’s easy to forget about it. But a person with true strength, true talent, and true morality, will turn towards it. We all have the capability of making the world a better place. It’s just a matter of utilizing it.

I hope this letter reaches you one day, and most of all, I hope it shows you a new perspective.

Thank you.

(via minusfourrespectpoints)

friendlyangryfeminist:

there are times I don’t want to be a feminist.

I don’t want to feel guilty for feeling guilty about eating enough. Can’t I just hate my body without hating myself for hating it?

I don’t want to know that sexual assault is so common, that what happened may happen again. I don’t want to walk into a classroom and realize that maybe twenty percent of the women in the room have been assaulted. 

I don’t want to know one out of sixteen of my male classmates are rapists. I want to walk around campus without thinking that. I want to walk home from bars, slightly drunk, without thinking that. I want to clutch my keys close to me in fear without having the useless reminder that no, my rapist isn’t likely to pop out from the bushes. I’m more likely to be friends with him. 

(Source: fauxcyborg)

Apple Employee: “I am sorry, we don’t sell to Persians.”

mohandasgandhi:

arielnietzsche:

“Very hurtful, very embarrassing. I actually walked out in tears.”
~Sahar Sabet

I find this tremendously offensive on so many levels; an American is an American regardless of their nationality.  By the way “Persian” is “Iranian.  There are as many as 1.5 million Iranian-Americans in this country; 50% of them have a college degree or higher as compared to the national average of 24%.  There have been multiple incidents of Iranian-Americans speaking Farsi in an Apple store and when asked if they were Iranian (although most tend to prefer the term Persian) … they were told that Apple’s policy is that they would not sell Apple products to Iranians due to America’s embargo on Iran.  By this standard – Apple shouldn’t allow Cubans or Koreans to buy Apple products either and IT IS in their company policy.

“Discrimination. Racially profiled. He didn’t have any business asking me what country I was from.”
~Sahar Sabet 

So – Apple has chosen to discriminate against Americans because of their blood line … even if they’re American.  If they speak Farsi … sorry – you’re probably a terrorist.  How do you tell an American who may have never even been to Iran or maybe hasn’t been there since they were kids that they’re just too ethnic to buy an Apple product.  Or does being an American now only mean being WHITE or Christian?  This IS what bigotry and racism looks like.

The NY Times has the story HERE:

Last month, Sahar Sabet, a 19-year-old Iranian-American woman, was improperly prevented from buying an iPad at an Apple store in Alpharetta, Ga. After she had gone over the various options with two Apple sales clerks, a third clerk, who had overheard Ms. Sabet speaking Persian to her uncle, intervened. He asked what language they were speaking and, when he found out it was the language of Iran, he said she could not buy anything because “our countries do not have good relations” — never mind that she intended to give it to her sister in North Carolina. A local news account had Ms. Sabet describing a cousin in Iran as the intended recipient, an inaccuracy that was propagated last week in a Wall Street Journal opinion article defending Apple’s discriminatory behavior.

In Santa Monica, Calif., two friends looking to buy an iPhone were asked whether they were speaking Persian and promptly informed, “I am sorry, we don’t sell to Persians.” In Sacramento, an Iranian-American man looking to buy Apple products for personal use mentioned that he was also thinking about buying an iPod for his nephew in Iran and was told he could not buy anything, even for himself. An Iranian student in Atlanta, and his Iranian-American friend, were not permitted to buy an iPhone after the friend, under questioning, mentioned that the student planned to return to Iran for the summer.

Apple’s policy states HERE:

PROHIBITED DESTINATIONS
The U.S. holds complete embargoes against Cuba, Iran, North Korea, Sudan, and Syria

The exportation, reexportation, sale or supply, directly or indirectly, from the United States, or by a U.S. person wherever located, of any Apple goods, software, technology (including technical data), or services to any of these countries is strictly prohibited without prior authorization by the U.S. Government. This prohibition also applies to any Apple owned subsidiary or any subsidiary employee worldwide.

DENIED PARTIES
Apple products may not be exported or re-exported to anyone on the U.S. Treasury Department’s list of Specially Designated Nationals or the U.S. Department of Commerce Denied Person’s List or Entity List.

Well, as an Iranian-American, I don’t buy products from bigots.

(Source: jayaprada)

I’ll have a cheeky browse of this ikvall

Oh don’t start with the Swedish on me, my brain will implode from exhaustion.

Andrew, I lied, here’s a link for the time being; feministdisney has some great dialogue on Laci in the first couple of pages. It’s also just a very good all-round blog.

three-completes-the-five:

Frizzle Frazzle, Razzle Dazzle: Laci Green

three-completes-the-five:

What the fuck just happened to tumblr, srsly?

For those of you (amongst my mighty 23 followers) who don’t know, Laci Green is this YouTuber who makes videos discussing sex and addressing viewers questions about it etc. It’s really informative and she creates this…

her apology

Ok Isobel, first (because I have no idea how to format tumblr posts) tell me exactly, and I mean EXACTLY, what part of this is apology is either bratty or framing herself as the victim.

  • First of all, you’re vastly misinformed. Laci Green didn’t just receive criticism for the slur (which is, actually, a slur, despite what you think, and I’ll come back to that) - she received criticism for her Islamophobia, and general religion-bashing and stereotyping

I was in fact well aware of all of this, but chose not to address it because that wasn’t what I wanted to talk about and more to the point, not something I’m informed about. I know next-to-nothing about Islam because I was not born into that, have not been educated in it, and have not bothered to educate myself about it. Maybe I should have mentioned it but it just wasn’t really on my agenda.

  • It is true, none of this warrants death threats - but

Nope, you can just stop right there after the word ‘threats’, thanks

  • With regards to the t-slur (etc)

Yo this is the part of my own post that I read back and think ‘…C’maawn’. My dubious reasoning here does leave me feeling pretty embarrassed and there’s no real justification for that.

  • I think you need to stop deluding yourself that the entirety of tumblr is against you, and do some research. You will be more than welcome in dialogues, even as a poor little “straight white cis male”, once you’ve done some learning. I can recommend some good blogs, if you’d like.

And this is the part of your post that I read and think ‘C’maawn’. This makes me feel extremely grown-up, intelligent and good about myself, also extremely welcome. I thank you for treating me with respect and integrity. 

At no point did I say or even intimate the entirety of tumblr was against me, and ‘once you’ve done some learning’? I have no shame in admitting that this made me feel like total shit, Isobel, there’s a level of condescension here that is just totally unwarranted.

But apart from that I’ve taken everything on board and I’m glad you replied to it and you’re welcome to throw dem blogs at me(Y).

Ah, I was referring to a different video with regards to the apology; it was the Islam comment that she a) refused to apologise for and b) was patronising over. Here’s a link to a discussion on it. My bad there.

My bad also for the bit about “deluding yourself.” It’s late, that was over the top, and I apologise.

Let me rephrase the death threats part then. Laci Green does not warrant being defended over her Islamophobia, transphobia, or inability to apologise for things she has said that may dehumanise or stereotype; she does not warrant being defended simply because people have been a little mean to her; we should not ignore everything she has done and simply white knight her because of this incident; but everyone, absolutely everyone, warrants being defended over death threats. That is base and inhuman. Better?

I’ll hit you with the blogs in the morning. It’s five past midnight, I am way too exhausted to be fluent in speaking. I can’t even remember what the word for that is. 

(Source: the-smiling-school, via the-smiling-school)

Laci Green

three-completes-the-five:

What the fuck just happened to tumblr, srsly?

For those of you (amongst my mighty 23 followers) who don’t know, Laci Green is this YouTuber who makes videos discussing sex and addressing viewers questions about it etc. It’s really informative and she creates this positive atmosphere about sex and a healthy environment to ask questions about it and things like that. 

She has a tumblr account that she uses to answer questions and just blog in general, and someone questioned her use of the word ‘tranny’ in a video three years ago. She replied in an embarrassed, ashamed way, apologised for it and even took the video down out of retrospective regret.

Done?

Nah, apparently that wasn’t enough. Over the course of a few days she recieved asks advising suicide, threatening murder and showing pictures of her flat and her home address (which obviously she has never given out over the internet), which forced Laci to leave the internet for at least a while after contacting the police about the whole affair.

What bothers me isn’t even necessarily the threats. Just go on Facebook and there’ll be death threats, verbal abuse and all sorts of shite about trivial things that have no substance whatsoever. It’s more the trigger (to coin a bullshit tumblr-derived phrase) that bothers me.

Tumblr has this bizarre dichotomy in that it can be an incredibly supportive environment for those who identify as transgender, non-binary, genderqueer and other groups that are generally under-represented in modern discourse - but at the same time these communities can have a completely poisonous attitude towards the uninitiated’s ignorance of phrases and terms that simply do not exist outside of these communities and the internet in general. 

Up until about 6 months ago, give or take, I had no fucking clue about any of these terms:

  • cis
  • cissexist
  • transphobic
  • ableism
  • privilege (in this context)

And yet I feel like I still wasn’t ignorant at all, or a bad person. Tumblr has created an environment that breeds hyper-socially-aware teenagers with little to no experience of any of these things irl, which breeds ignorance about ignorance. It’s such a fascinating paradox to me that these people who are so involved with and owe so much to the proliferation of these terms, are so protective of them and deal with ignorance about them in such a completely inappropriate and hateful way.

The vindictiveness of the comments directed at Laci is alarming in itself but it’s more the reasons for it that worry me, just using this word that is (SPOILER ALERT) a word that is in use in the world at large and that - at least where I come from - doesn’t even have any particularly negative connotation, it’s just a contraction of the more widely-used ‘transsexual’.

That’s what worries me, that all of this started over the use of a commonplace (though seemingly offensive) word that was simply used in the wrong public forum.

I’m just a cisgender heterosexual male though, what the fuck do I know?

Ok, Andrew, I have a few points to this;

First of all, you’re vastly misinformed. Laci Green didn’t just receive criticism for the slur (which is, actually, a slur, despite what you think, and I’ll come back to that) - she received criticism for her Islamophobia, and general religion-bashing and stereotyping. She has also supposedly made domestic violence jokes, though I haven’t seen these myself and can’t vouch for them. The criticism increased when her responses to these criticisms were not, as you said, ashamed and apologetic - they were somewhat bratty, trying to frame her as the victim, and usually relied on tone arguments. Telling someone who is offended but has not really attacked you to “calm down” and that they’re “ruining their own cause” is not professional, or ashamed. It’s being upset because someone called you out.

It is true, none of this warrants death threats - but it certainly does not warrant anyone defending Laci’s actions, or trying to forget her past.

With regards to the t-slur, it is not up to you to determine whether it’s a slur or not. Maybe you’ve never experienced it as a slur. Maybe it’s part of the common dialogue where you come from. Gay slurs are a common part of the dialogue where I come from, but that doesn’t make them ok, and it doesn’t remove the fact that they are also still used as real insults, to put people down, to say “you are like this group and therefore you are less”. You don’t get to decide how a word affects people, especially when such word has been historically used to insult and dehumanise.

I think you need to stop deluding yourself that the entirety of tumblr is against you, and do some research. You will be more than welcome in dialogues, even as a poor little “straight white cis male”, once you’ve done some learning. I can recommend some good blogs, if you’d like.

(Source: the-smiling-school)

endquestionmark:

I don’t get why Elementary has such a rabidly defensive fandom when it hasn’t even aired yet, anyway.

you know, i have no fucking idea

oh, wait

could it be because ninety nine point nine barred percent of sherlock fandom decided to pile into our tag and post misogynistic, sexist, racist, queer-baiting-glorifying, heteronormative bullshit?

possibly that could be it

(via bloodhitthesky-deactivated20121)

Black Women’s Transitions to Natural Hair

surfeitdoldrums:

A video on black women’s decision to embrace their naturally kinky hair, rather than use chemical straighteners.